Message from Friend

This is an e-mail from a high school friend that has a 4 year old son with Down Syndrome.

Scott:

When I read your message I started to cry. Your message immediately took me back to the birth of my little boy 4 years ago. We too did not know until he was born that he had DS. At the time, we were both devastated, we were expecting one little boy and got another. It felt like we had experienced the death of a child. For the first few days, I am ashamed to say, I begged god to undo it. I begged. I was so scared. I was scared because I felt like I failed. I was scared about what other people would think. I was mostly scared because I didn't think I would measure up to the task. My little boy spent 14 days in the NICU because he was not getting enough oxygen on his own. By the third day I was over my fear. I had accepted it and I loved him. I begged god to let him be okay and to let me take him home. I promised I would baptize all my kids and raise them to know god if he let me take him home. We were very lucky because other than that first two weeks, he has not had any real health issues. You should know that the "why us" will turn into "thank god it was us" at some point. I promise. There are a lot of things to know about kids with DS. First, you will have to fight for your kid every step of the way. Most people, including doctors, do not know anything about DS. You will become an expert. Did your son have a heart issue? 60% of kids born with DS do. That is actually very common. I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers. You must know that you will eventually see this and feel this differently. What you are feeling now is normal. Don't beat yourself up over it. I did for a long time. You are going to experience love like you never have before. He is going to open your heart in ways you never imagined. Get out of your head the notion that he is not going to be like other kids or will not be into the things you are into. He is more like other kids than he is different. My little boy is so fun and active. He is so much tougher and happier and more full of life than any other kid his age that I know. You are a good man and will be a great father. You don't realize it yet, but this was a great gift that has been given to you. I am smiling knowing that this great little boy was born into a loving family. Please call me. I am in D.C. for work but will be able to take your call. xxx-xxx-xxxx. If you get my voice mail, leave me a number where I can reach you and I will call you back. Hang in there buddy. I promise you that you can both do this and it will be great. I hope your little boy is okay.

Mike (11/28/2012)